It is part of the human process to do some stupid stuff now and again. Beating yourself up over a mistake made, or repeated, is something that we need to do sometimes to give ourselves a wakeup call. But how much beating up is too much? Some of us can cope with everything that befalls us in life. We take it as part of our stride and move on, not thinking twice about the past, but learning from the experience. However, there are a large number of people who take it as a personal failure if they do something that they have been trained and indoctrinated to feel is “wrong” or “sinful”. Though self-criticism has the power to change you for the better, sometimes it can lead to the other end of the slope. When self criticizing turns deadly and suicidal…
There a thousands, if not millions, of lost souls who make that ultimate jump and take their own lives. Why? It is probably the rarest thing in the world to have somebody screaming in their ear while they tie the noose, mark the spot on their wrist or gather the pills to swallow. True, a lot of external factors may play a part in the decision for someone to self harm or commit suicide, but the loudest voice that sealed the deal is usually the voice that is inside their heads. There is nothing worse than having your own mind be your worst enemy.
The signs happen early. When you find that you praise yourself much less as compared to putting yourself down and being negative towards everything you say or do in life, you know that you are on the dark side of self criticism. Slowly but surely you will find that the darkness begins to poison every thought about yourself. This soon raises its ugly head as depression, where for hours and then days, you sit there in the darkness, wondering why you’re even trying. Before you know it, you’re scouring the Internet and dropping hints to loved ones about “how it would be if I wasn’t here” or “what you need to do for my funeral”.
The truth is that no one is perfect. If we think we are perfect, we are just one comment or one mistake away from judging ourselves. Remember that there is nothing that can be done to something or a situation that has already passed. If there’s any judgement being carried out, it’s only you on yourself. No one else can control how you feel about yourself. In this tough, uncertain world, you need to make sure that you can depend your own friendship and support to carry you through another day.